Another Blogger Figures this Election Madness Out (Or Doesn’t…You Be the Judge)

I knew she wasn’t going to win. I knew it for months. The polls didn’t matter. His shenanigans didn’t matter. I knew because of the things I heard people saying at my place of work, in my community, on the social media sites I frequented. I wanted to be wrong, but deep down, I knew.

So now it’s over. There are whispers of electoral college upheaval and/or election tampering leading to possible audits and recounts, but I maintain the same stance I always have. A little glimmer of hope is okay, but realistically, we have what we have in this moment. And currently that’s President Elect Donald Trump. How bizarre that feels to type!

I reacted in the way I reacted. We all have.

crying

And this has led to much scrutiny and criticism not just from the “other” side, but from within the own ranks of progressive liberals. People like me are often the more “sensitive” types which also means we tend to be harder on ourselves than others ever could be on us. It can make us sitting ducks for even light bullying – the type where people put down the way we think, feel, and process because we’ll listen to their criticisms and try to alter ourselves so as not to offend. Pleasers.

And so I have read these rants where even liberals knock their compatriots in this overly-reflective standpoint of “How did we screw this up? What did we do wrong as a political party? What is the answer to this madness?”

On all sides, there’s so much finger pointing and judgement! “This is why he won.” “No, THIS is why she lost!” “You’re all such whiners!” I’ve read so many pontifications upon this topic; so self-assured is each person who proclaims to have figured out the one real reason our country is right now in the situation we are in, and why and how we “got what we deserved.” I’m not quite so self-assured, but I do think that I have a compelling case for the real truth of the matter, if you’d care to read on.

To lay the groundwork for my viewpoint, here’s a top ten of some of the most common certainties I’ve read about as to the single reason why the former host of “The Apprentice” has been elected POTUS, AKA why we weren’t ready or willing to elect Hillary Clinton:

top-10

10. America is way more racist and xenophobic, homophobic, etc. than so many of us had any idea of. Trump overturned every neo-nazi rock in our nation and rallied the dregs of society. They call themselves “children of the sun” and they actually believe that straight white people are OPPRESSED in these modern times. Tomorrow belongs to them. So they got out and they voted in droves.

tomorrow-belongs

9.Liberals are super annoying with their PC crap and intellectual elitism and fancy-schmansy all-blah blah blah/no action, and the majority of “real” people are plum tired of it and are taking power back. Stop whining liberals! (This even comes from fellow liberals). You turn everyone off with your lame salty crocodile tears, sugar puffs. Feeling and talking about your emotions doesn’t solve jack diddly. Toughen up and take your book smarts back to the library! It’s time for street smarts and good old gut-level reactions to rule the roost again! Where is your dignity? Where is your self respect?

8. Hillary Clinton’s campaign sucked in a major way. And they got cocky. They were sucky and cocky. They did nothing right. It was theirs to lose and they lost it because of their cocky suckiness.

7. Media! All of it! Awful media, regular and social and otherwise. And all of the idiots who post anything and don’t check a fact and the other idiots who read the same propaganda posts and share them and the slanted headlines of all the media. It’s the media’s fault!

6. It all boils down to Obama for one of two reasons:

a. He is the worst most divisive president ever and never should have been in office let alone served two terms and after all of the terrible things he’s done (you know what they are…no I don’t HAVE to list a single one; it’s obvious) America is ready to finally clean up his crap like only conservatives can.

b. He has been the best POTUS ever, but see number ten. Racist America has not accepted him and so they rallied to take their white power back. Trump is just capitalizing on it – uniting these feckless fools for his own power and financial gain.

5. The stubbornest Bernie Bros screwed everything up with their sour grapes after the primaries.

sour-grapes

Especially those little know-nothing-yet millennials who would rather be contrary to “the man” than face the depth of their contributions to this insanity. They jumped on the same exact bandwagon as the Trumpettes to bring Hillary Clinton down with lies and beating the same dead horses on a witchhunt.

Incidentally, dead horses are terrible at witch hunting, seeing as they’re dead and all. But I’m pretty sure that annoying chick from “Blair Witch Project” hopped a plane to Salem and took on the case with her documentary crew and she’s super at hunting witches.

blair-witch

All it takes is one person catching on and pointing and shouting “Witch!” to start a crucible movement. Berners and Trumpers have been shouting “Clinton! Witch!” from the tops of buildings for many months.Some of them for years! This reached the people who don’t care much about politics, don’t like to watch the news, don’t care to read, and just needed someone to tell them what to do. “Hillary’s evil? Are you sure? Well, okay, you’ve never lied to me before (that I know of). We’ll go with that and I can get back to watching YouTube videos about eating bacon and videogame folklore and stuff.”

4. EMAILS! The DNC did this (aided and abetted by  Wikileaks) with their email plotting against the King Savior our Lord Bernie Sanders because they’re just as corrupt as the alt-right! Those shady bastahds were chomping so hard at the bit to push their liberal agenda of a chick prez that they inadvertently made an already perceived “untrustworthy” Clinton look like she was in bed with Lucifer himself (while Bill watched. Smoking a cigar and eating some vegan tacos or something. Those freaky Clintons!)

This all means Bernie got screwed ,so see number 5. I am protest voting against Clinton even though I see her innocence because I want to make a point to corrupt government jerkadoos like the DNC.

email

Or, more prominently, Clinton and her pompous private server and 30 gatrillion emails she had destroyed by smashing all of her personal electronics with a polo mallet and then loading the pieces onto a hijacked space capsule that’s currently 200 miles deep inside a crater on the moon – how could I vote for her ever when she did THAT? Grab who by the what now? Fraud? Rape charges? Sexual assault charges? Won’t release tax returns? Trump destroyed his own electronic correspondences he was court ordered to turn over in some of the hundreds of court cases filed agains him?  Stop talking! I can’t hear anymore about any of that. All I have room for  in my head is “Clinton’s emails.” Followed a close second by Benghazi. Exonerated you say? Only because she paid them all off or they’re scared she’ll have them killed. (See number 5 – witchhunt).

3. Trump. Russia. Collusion. Tampering with the election. Intelligence exists. Investigations are pending. Trump called the election rigged up until he started winning and then he was like, “Those Russian poindexter computer nerd dudes actually put their money where their mouth is. Hot damn! I’m gonna be president.” Then his face fell as reality slapped him hard. “Holy gold-plated toilet plungers! I’m gonna be president…Maird!”

2. Too many people in our country are ignorant dumb-dumb heads and they bought a long slow con by a man named Don. They said hello to promises of jobs, tax lowering, better education, lower crime, locking up evil witches via special prosecutors, a free wall with built in salsa spickets and chip dispensers designed for protection from bad guys, and the possibility of a dream that never was – the Mayberry version of America past. They were too shtupnagal to realize that was just a squeaky clean sitcom in the 50s and there is no great America to go back to because we have continued a steady evolution as a nation, which is the very thing that makes us great ALL THE TIME already. Oh but Democrats are the whiners…sigh.

In essence, a certain tangerine swindler convinced them that we are a pathetic, dark dystopia where you can’t walk out your door without being attacked by druglords who have been sent over by backwards terrorist-based countries to bring us down because we’re so much better than them, and it’s time to fight back! Hurrah!!

They bought a snake oil infused fat shrinking wrinkle reducing sex enhancing cream that eradicates all stains (even blood) and will arrive at your door with free shipping within two weeks, packaged in a beautiful gold bottle with a sexy girl in a bikini on the label.

shamwow

And if you vote now, we’ll add a second bottle FREE! (If you consider internment camps, overpopulation due to no birth control, tax cuts for only the top 1%, and a one million of our tax dollars a day to pay for double security because a certain orange someone doesn’t want to leave his golden tower in NYC “free” that is…)

And then there’s number one, and it’s my personal number one because it resonates the most with me from my own plethora of observations and the conversations I’ve had with others throughout this election cycle:

  1. SEXISM!

sexism

Yeah, I hear all of the conservatives, the centrists, and even some liberals groaning. That old chestnut. Come on! Sexism is for “Mad Men.” But yes, this is the real deal, kids. Take a deeper look. It’s systemic, and I believe it’s a very big reason why so many women voted for Trump and so many people who couldn’t stomach voting for Trump just didn’t vote at all. We have been raised for generations to trust men more with the tough stuff, to feel taken care of by men, and us women are deeply wired to kick ourselves for just about everything we do, and rely on our sexuality to feel valued.

It’s true! Don’t deny it! Get real about it or we can’t fix it. It’s a problem! So many of us still subconsciously contribute to it, in spite of knowing better, because we just haven’t come as far as we thought.

And so, a very competent woman with a great resume and just a couple of black marks which have been deeply investigated and proven to not be criminal was deemed “the lesser of two evils” at best, by so many. To others, she was simply evil. A liar. A crook. Untrustworthy. Not charismatic. Shrill. Ugly. Old. A grandma. Sickly. Obnoxiously power hungry.

Whereas DT being cutthroat made him a “good businessman” (in spite of oh so many failings and hidden tax returns that hide who knows what) HRC seen as cutthroat made her a bad seed. The worst the government has ever seen. A NASTY woman. The queen bitch at the helm of the most powerful mafia-like government corruption. Quite possibly a murderer. Probably. COME ON!!!

These were actual things people said to me during the election. ACTUAL THINGS!! And when I pointed out the laundry list of oh so many worse things that were PROOF of Don-the-cons nonsense, things that came out of his own mouth and were not just speculation like they had on Clinton, I heard “Well, yeah, but he’s something different. And we need different in our government. He’s refreshing in his honesty.” HONESTY???

We had different. It’s called give a woman a chance to run our country for once and see what happens. Think about every family gathering where some matriarch in your lineage pulled everything together and made it all happen, delegating like a master at the same time she cared about your feelings and made you feel nurtured and worked the crowd with her organic social skills and fed you kickass food. Women offer different things in the way they lead. Sexism made too many discredit Hillary Clinton before they really gave her a chance, even though she WAS the right PERSON for the job.

BUT….here’s my two (or ten, as it were) cents about the REAL reason we are in this mess of a pending Trump presidency instead of awaiting the professionalism and poise of Hillary Clinton as our new chief to hail. What is that one true thing, above all else, which caused this?

drumroll-please

Trick question.

It’s not one thing. It’s ALL OF THE ABOVE, and then some more I didn’t even mention. It was the perfect storm of a bunch of stuff. Orchestrated stuff. Poorly timed stuff. Accidental stuff. Dust, wind, air pressure. Stuff.

trump-tangerine-tornado_zpsb8znizdo

When my house is a mess, it’s not just clothes on the floor. It’s disheveled couch pillows, foot piercing Legos strewn about, dismantled Star Wars action figures spread all over, videogames and electrical cords all askew, dishes piled high, litter boxes to scoop, sheets to change, toilets riddled with poorly aimed boy pee to scour – it’s all of the above!

So I say to those of us who are on the not-so-fond-of-Trump side, stop trying to point fingers at the one messiest of the messes in our house to try and figure out why it’s messy, and just get to cleaning. Because it’s all part of the mess. ALL OF IT!

We’ve got work to do. Lots of it.

Oh, and I call “not it” on the litter boxes.

Way too much crap to sift through at the moment.

trumpy-cat

 

 

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